15th June 2008

Dogs should pay attention to the lesson

posted in media, pets |

Use of the movie as a teaching tool has been common practice for many years. Even back in high school we were shown the occasional two-reeler as a way to kill off an exciting period or two of something academic. Sadly, proposed changes to the Imaginary Property laws may make such things impossible for future generations, but until such time as a new law receives Royal Assent we should profit (in the imaginary sense). This afternoon, I decided to teach my dog some things about life, so we flipped channels until the “right choice” was available.

Sometime after supper, when dogs are relaxed and vaguely attentive to what we teach them, I came upon a screening of Il Buono, Il Brutto, Il Cattivo (aka The Good The Bad & The Ugly for you monophones). A fine choice, if teaching your dog is the aim. After all, here is the story of all that mankind does to be unlike his best friend. A great western, as well.

I don’t want to get into specific details, because even though the original was released more than four decades ago, you might not have seen it yet, and spoilers are so unfair. Let’s use some of the things that might be useful to a dog. First of all, when you go roaming around seemingly abandoned buildings in some western town, there might be strangers inside. A well-prepared dog won’t bark unnecessarily, as this betrays the team position, and if you can jump the man with the gun, you will score treats (later, after danger time has passed).

Similarly, if a bunch of people are gathered around a bridge, and both sides have cannons and other loud toys, try not to distract them from the situation. Maybe they’re watching for an important reason, and if they start shooting in all directions, you and your person could be injured. Once again, don’t bark unless you absolutely have to.

Dogs should watch out for any vehicle towed by teams of horses. The horse doesn’t see equally in all directions, and is easily distracted by loud noises (such as barking) and by men with whips. The stagecoach might run over one of your paws, and that is painful. Pay attention, dog! Stop sleeping through the movie.

Finally, if one of the people that your human has been hanging around with is seen hanging from a rope attached to a tree, don’t bark unnecessarily. You might distract the person standing on their tippy-toes, and they might slip and die. This is a lot of detail for a sleeping dog, but this movie does have important information for your future among humans.

This entry was posted on Sunday, June 15th, 2008 at 21:59 and is filed under media, pets. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. | 437 words. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

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