Like Nessie, not always in evidence
Think of it as a retail romance. I’m referring to my long term, ongoing, frustrating relationship with the local box store hardware emporium. A place with an inventory count that requires high school math, but that never seems to stock what I’m looking for.
Tonight, I wanted something simple. The technical label is “Union – 1/2 In. PVC Schedule 40 Cross All Slip”. Otherwise known as unavailable. Never seen one. Probably a figment of your imagination. There are photographs (just like Nessie). SKU numbers. Suggested retail prices, in Canada. Doesn’t make it any easier to purchase.
I spoke with the nice man in the green smock. We’ve talked before, and he’s convinced that I have no need for anything he sells. After all, this is the plumbing section, and I only want to build antennas. Apples and codfish.
And so I switched to Plan B. Requires that I walk up and down the aisles, periodically reaching out to touch some material while I try to visualize an alternative use. No Eureka moments, so I saddled up and switched stores. And settled for a broom handle and a small plastic container with wood screws. To go with the wooden rod. Cheap evening.
Now, in a different world, I could order a commercial antenna, but that would go against the grain. I’m an amateur, and honour bound to do things cheaply. Virtuous.
Oh well, it can wait until next week. I’m now on a three-day furlough, with a leave pass that will take me to the big city. Maybe they have a plumbing store that can sell me what I want.
